By Forrest Wayne Schultz
There was something strange about the woman driving the Hotel limousine which had just picked me up at the airport. The awe with which she greeted me made no sense. Then, she insisted that I was already registered!. And it was with great excitement that she walked with me to my suite and unlocked the door for me, almost as if she were hurrying me inside. She was.
Something in the "atmosphere" in the suite slapped away my puzzlements, pulled my attention toward a gadget on the table, and impelled me to pick it up. I did so just in time to enable a very good man to complete an ultra-important and ultra-secret mission, which I cannot divulge here because I do not know what it was, and did not need to know and, in fact, do not even want to know.
The man had just been shot by one of the "bad guys", which is what I shall call them because their identity is also secret and also something I do not care to know. Picking up the gadget tuned me in to what was happening and caused all the bad guys to be slain as soon as I detected, and became enraged at, their wickedness.
The gunshot wound was so severe that the man barely had the strength to email his report to the super-secret agency for which he worked. Just before he died, he sensed I was "there" and asked me to please drive his BMW to his farm in ______ .
I already knew I was supposed to do this from holding the gadget in my hand, and, in fact, the man only was able to stutter out the beginning part of this, which I finished and to which he nodded and, with his last breath, said "Thank you and Good-bye".
Sensing the need for haste, I quickly strapped the gadget onto the palm of my hand, pulled on my gloves, put the keys to his BMW into the pocket of my overcoat, left the suite, and headed to the parking lot. As I was leaving the Hotel in the BMW, I sensed that the limousine driver was following me, and I also knew that she was one of the "good guys", though not one of the secret agents, but rather was some kind of spiritual warrior.
Even though the man had died, I was still in touch with him in some way through his gadget, so that I just "knew" which streets and roads to take to get to his farm, and I "knew" the need for haste.
On the way there I wondered who in the world the man was because he looked just like me and, apparently, my being in tune with his gadget was due to the strong bond between us, as though he were my identical twin. I had been so busy that until now I had no time to think about it. I had no clue to the answer because, as I far as I know, I am not a twin, but now I began to wonder.
I figured, though, that the time for pondering that would be later because I needed now to focus on the next task, to which I sensed strong opposition. I also sensed the prayers of the spiritual-warrior lady behind me, who was
now driving her own personal car, a Jaguar -- a tough cat symbolizing a tough lady!! I joined my prayers to hers as I pulled into the lane to the farm.
As instructed by the gadget, I immediately entered the farm house, found my way to the secret door leading to the secret tunnel, leading to the secret room, in which I found the secret closet with the secret vault which I opened
with the other key on the key chain, and immediately pressed my thumb upon the designated circle and then heard the wondrous beautiful tones of the symphony of victory I was promised would happen upon my obedience.
The cloud of oppression was lifted, the sun started shining, the birds started singing, and the Grandfather's Clock began chiming Twelve Noon, and the warrior lady drove her Jaguar up the driveway. She was arrayed from head to foot in Jaguar mode -- Jaguar cap, Jaguar dress, Jaguar boots, Jaguar coat, Jaguar earrings, and Jaguar purse. As she began her ascent up the stairs toward me on the porch, I reached into my pocket, pulled out the ornate box, took from it the Magenta-Ring and placed it upon her finger as she reached the top step.
Thereupon, a lawyer emerged from hiding in the shrubbery and announced that this property and all other property of the testator was now mine because I had just fulfilled the criteria for inheritance! We then went inside where I signed the legal papers.
What is behind all this I have no idea but I do know I did what was right and that is what is important.
While we were in the study going over the legal papers, the Jaguar lady was waiting in the living room. After I had signed everything the lawyer asked me if the Jaguar lady was my woman. He said that, if not, he would check her out. Before I had a chance to reply, he said, "Oh, before I forget it, that reminds me, I want to invite you to join our Lions Club." I replied, "You know, I think I will! I will need to be a Lion to keep that Jaguar lady under control!!". "Good!", he chuckled, "I knew you would accept, which is why I brought your ID card and this Lions jacket for you to wear."
The man-to-man bravado of my reply evaporated as soon as the lawyer left and I was alone with the Jaguar Lady. Her attractive appearance and her vibrant presence were so overwhelming I was speechless. Her Jaguar apparel was so powerful because it expressed what she was -- The Jaguar Lady. But I recovered my bravado as I reminded myself that "I Am Now A Lion; and The Lion Is King Of Beasts!!". I looked her straight in the eye and proclaimed with solemnity, "When I placed The Magenta-Ring Upon Your Finger, I Took You To Be My Wife!!". With smiling face and twinkling eye she replied, "Well, of course! What else could it mean? Now you shall meet MY legal official -- a justice of the peace who will make it legal and here he comes ready to knock on the door!".
Indeed her legal man was just as prepared as mine. Signing the forms took only a few minutes and then he bade us goodbye. I could hardly believe this! The Jaguar Lady ---- My Wife!! The Jaguar Lady !!!!
December 16, 2008 A.D.